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A Simple Twist of Fate: Jim and Penny Sandonato

When Jim Sandonato decided to list his home on the market in 1987, he reached out to a realtor acquaintance for help. At the time, Jim, 48, was a successful electrical engineer on a spiritual journey, deeply involved in meditation groups, which is where he met his soon-to-be realtor.

Ardenwoods residents Jim and Penny Sandonato
Jim and Penny Sandonato

But, as fate would have it, the day before she was to come by and view the house, his acquaintance called him with a change of plans: “She said: ‘I just quit my job to go on the road with my husband. But my boss will come by, and she’ll take good care of you,’” Jim recalled. “The next day, Penny showed up. And that’s how we met.”

Penny, 46 at the time, was both an artist and the head of a real estate firm in South Jersey, where the two both lived. Having previously owned her own crafts gallery, she spent much of her free time on textile arts, creating beautiful collages of hand-dyed fabrics.

Like Night and Day

Jim and Penny were very different people — “like night and day,” Penny said. But, for six months, the pair drove all over Pennsylvania and New Jersey looking for a new home for Jim, and, spending lots of time together in the process, their conversations grew deeper with every excursion.

Penny, a single parent of two, had just experienced the tragic loss of her oldest child, who was killed in an automobile accident a month prior. “That just flipped my life completely,” she said. “I was kind of floating around, knowing I needed something but not finding what it was exactly. So, meeting Jim really made all the difference for me — not just by being able to talk to somebody about a very personal thing, but also because he suggested I come to his meditation group. And that was a huge transition in my life.”

A New Chapter

One year of friendship, meditation and one sold house later, the two began dating, and a year after that, in 1989, they married on the beach in Sea Isle City, New Jersey.

“We learned a lot in our lives being single and wanted, I think, to do it right this time,” said Penny, comparing their early relationship to the title characters in “When Harry Met Sally” — laughing at the silly ways they often butted heads. “It was really a commitment for both of us, but we had a real desire to make it work.”

“We thought we knew how to do it right before,” Jim explained, “but we really ended up learning a lot from each other, about how to grow together.”

Despite their differences, the couple formed a strong bond over meditation, yoga, spirituality and other Eastern philosophies on healing. “You know, life happens — marriages, raising a family, unsuccessful relationships,” said Jim, who has five children from previous marriages. “And in all those years, you dip down and want to find a way to pull yourself back up. The whole spirituality thing happened when I was doing a lot of searching, trying to find the answer, and eventually found meditation and yoga.”

For Jim, this discovery was a huge step forward. “I traveled to India four times — I actually lived there for a year,” he said. He did workshops with spiritual teacher and yoga guru Ram Dass, and he even earned his second-degree black belt in aikido, a martial art that focuses solely on defense. “And though I sort of guided Penny into Eastern thought, she really did her own thing. I was into the gurus, and she went into a Buddhist sangha. Our connection was on a spiritual level, and that, for me, was the biggest thing.”

Jim And Penny scaled e1687787104904
Jim and Penny traveling near Lisbon, Portugal

During this period of introspection and self-exploration, Penny realized that real estate wasn’t her calling after all, and soon went back to school to earn a master’s degree in counseling.

“I wanted to do counseling to help heal people, because after losing my son, I needed to be healed too,” she explained. “And a good way to heal yourself is to do something for somebody else, so it just clicked for me. It was something that allowed me to be more creative and feel more comfortable in.”

Love at First Sight

A few years later, the couple read an article in a magazine about the Asheville area and drove down from New Jersey to check it out for themselves. “We came over the mountains through Tennessee, and I started to cry,” Penny explained. “I just said, ‘This is it.’ It was love at first sight. Asheville was just the perfect place, both for art and spirituality.” The Sandonatos have now lived in Asheville for 26 years, the last two of which they’ve spent at Ardenwoods.

About 10 years before retiring, Jim took up a second career — one vastly different from his longstanding work in electrical engineering.

“I had started doing consciousness-raising workshops and things like that, learning more about myself, and Shiatsu therapy was part of it,” Jim said. “It involves the meridians in the body, which are essentially energy channels, very much like electrical wiring. It was almost like electrical engineering that could be translated to the body, using the body’s circuits instead of building circuits.”

Jim enjoyed a second career in Shiatsu therapy until the COVID-19 pandemic, which made this type of work nearly impossible. Then, in August 2021, after a few health scares for both husband and wife, they decided to take the leap and move to Ardenwoods.

“We started to come here to attend some of the activities (with friends who are residents) and saw how friendly everybody was. It’s just our kind of place,” Penny said. “There’s a lot of creativity here. There’s a singing group and a dance group — there’s a very good yoga teacher — and, you know, everything you could possibly want. And even if you don’t want to do anything, that’s perfectly fine too.”

At Ardenwoods, Jim serves on both the Building and Grounds and Wellness committees, which each use knowledge from his two separate careers. In his spare time, he enjoys the community’s tai chi, yoga and strength training classes.

Ardenwoods Artwork
Penny and Jim Sandonato with some of Penny’s artwork

Though Penny is currently recovering from an injury, she said she’s excited to get back into Ardenwoods’ creative classes, which she previously enjoyed. Until then, Jim is happy to direct visitors to his talented wife’s artwork, which hangs in the lobby halls.

“One of the things that Penny used to say often when we were first married was that we had so much history that was separate from one another. We didn’t have any history together,” Jim said. “Well, here we are 33 years later: We have history together.”

The Beat Goes On

Here at Ardenwoods, we embrace the joy of music and the power of rhythm, and there’s no better time to celebrate than National Drum Month in May.

drum circle morrow
Finding the rhythm

On May 1, Ardenwoods hosted Rhythm Facilitator, Larry McDowell, who led our residents in a wonderful drum circle event, coinciding with the festive tradition of May Day.  Though it was a quite chilly afternoon, Larry’s infectious enthusiasm quickly warmed the hearts of residents, who were overjoyed to experience the thrill of community percussion. Bringing both musical magic and a slew of instruments to the annual event, Larry and his son encouraged participants to chant the uplifting and inspiring message, “life is change,” in between boisterous beats.

And it’s no wonder many residents look forward to this event each year: Drumming has been shown to bring brain-boosting benefits for people of all ages — but it’s especially fruitful for seniors.

DRUM CIRCLES CAN:

drum circle rosemary zimmerman
More cowbell!

Build a sense of community. As the rhythmic beats echoed through the air on May 1, so did the sense of togetherness and camaraderie. The event served as a reminder that music transcends age and brings people closer.

Produce therapeutic effects. Beyond just enjoyment and social connection, drumming holds numerous therapeutic benefits for seniors. The steady beats and vibrations can have a positive impact on overall well-being — stimulating the brain, enhancing cognitive function and promoting focus and concentration. It can also provide a cathartic release for emotions, reducing stress levels and bringing a sense of calm and inner peace.

Improve physical abilities. Drumming can improve coordination, circulation, motor skills and dexterity, making it an excellent form of exercise for seniors. Feeling the rhythm at your fingertips also provides a powerful boost of energy that creates a ripple effect throughout the body — even energizing the immune system.

drum circle roy beaty
Ardenwoods’ drum circle

Simply be fun. Jamming with other residents in a drum circle is a great way to simultaneously learn new skills, express yourself musically and be social. Just about anyone can beat out a basic rhythm, so no experience is required to have fun.

The annual drum circle never fails to ignite a thunderous spirit here at Ardenwoods, unleashing our residents’ inner rockstar and showcasing the healing power of percussion. As the energy of this event reverberates throughout our community, we invite our residents to continue honoring National Drum Month by embracing the rhythm of life — together.

Earth Day Champion: Elaine Marten

After moving to Ardenwoods seven years ago, Elaine Marten noticed a need to improve recycling practices in her new community.

A former chemist and volunteer with the North Carolina Department of Environmental Quality, Elaine is passionate about reducing her carbon footprint and encouraging others to do the same.

Earth Day Champion
Retired chemist, Elaine Marten

“At Ardenwoods, we have the typical bin for mixed, recycled materials,” she explained. “But I noticed that it was being badly contaminated with trash that should not have been deposited there. I wanted to help get us moving in the right direction and get all contaminants out of our recycling stream.”

Rather than waiting for change to happen on its own, Elaine took matters into her own hands — quite literally — not only spreading awareness of local recycling capabilities throughout the community, but also sifting through the community’s bins herself to filter out trash and other nonrecyclable items. She and other like-minded residents also led the initiative to hang informative posters in the community’s recycling rooms and distribute educational pamphlets to residents upon move-in.

“Our goals are to save and direct as many recyclable materials as possible toward the proper destinations, so that they will be converted back into usable raw materials,” Elaine explained. “Part of that work can be pretty grubby, pretty down and dirty. And the other part is to educate our resident population on what materials should be placed in that bin and in what condition and what should be excluded and discarded as trash.”

Earth Day

Last week, Earth Day celebrations brought attention to many important environmental issues, recycling included — but it’s important to remember proper waste disposal practices all year long.

Marten and baby goat
Environmental champion, Elaine Marten with a new friend

“To me, preserving and extending the integrity of our planet is what Earth Day is all about,” and each of us has a responsibility to do our own part toward that goal, Elaine said. “Wise and efficient use of natural resources minimizes the amount of earthly disfiguration that has to go into making some of these materials — whether it’s our destructive mining industry or our energy-consuming efforts to produce plastics, refined metals, glasses, paper and other recyclables.

“Saving paper from the landfill means we are saving forests,” she continued, “and, to me, that’s a very worthwhile goal.”

Buncombe County Recycling Rundown

What May I Recycle?

  • Metal cans and empty aerosol cans (aluminum, steel or tin)
  • Plastic bottles, jars and plastic food containers #1 through #7
    • (Exception: black microwavable trays and styrofoam)
  • Glass bottles and jars (clear, brown or green)
  • Aluminum pie tins and food trays
  • Milk and juice cartons
  • Newspapers and inserts
  • Corrugated cardboard
  • Mixed paper:
    • Catalogs, junk mail, magazines, egg cartons (paper), envelopes, manila envelopes, office paper, phone books, glossy paper, Post-It notes, cereal boxes, brown paper bags, paper towel rolls, shredded paper (place in paper bag with top rolled down), etc.

How To Prepare Recyclables

  • Rinse all bottles and cans – lids and labels may remain on.
  • Flatten plastic jugs and bottles
  • Break down and flatten corrugated cardboard

What is NOT Recyclable?

  • Aluminum foil
  • Dishes or cookware
  • Styrofoam
  • Plastic wrap
  • Window or mirror glass
  • Plastic bags (please take these to Ingles, Walmart, Target, etc.)
  • Lightbulbs
  • Drinking glasses
  • Paper towels or tissue
  • Black microwavable trays

Farm Fresh: WNC Farmers Markets

Farm Fresh

Spring has sprung in the North Carolina mountains, and apart from the beautiful flowers that herald this time of year, it’s also a great time to enjoy other popular plants from our region in the form of farm-fresh produce. Asheville and the surrounding area are burgeoning with local farmers and tailgate markets, and spring is a great time to visit one or all of these local markets to get your fresh-from-the-farm fix.

Below are some of our favorite local markets which offer locally grown produce, locally raised meats and cheeses, and even artisan-made crafts.

Western North Carolina Farmers Market

Tomatoes at famers market
Fresh produce at WNC Farmers Market

The Western North Carolina Farmers Market is a sprawling complex located just off of Interstate 40 and is a great way to sample much of what our region has to offer. Spend a few hours browsing fresh fruits and vegetables, jams, honey, and local craftwork. Then, grab lunch at the deli. Make sure to also stop by neighboring Jesse Israel & Sons Garden and Nursery Center, which offers a variety of trees and flowers, including a greenhouse full of tropical plants and a 40-foot waterfall.

Asheville City Market

City Market
Asheville City Market

Asheville’s largest weekly farmers market is the Asheville City Market. It is held in downtown Asheville on Saturday mornings at North Market Street between Woodfin and Walnut Streets in downtown Asheville. Asheville City Market is a producer-only market, which means that all farm vendors grow, raise, or locally source the products they are selling. Offerings vary with the season—one of the benefits of buying local—but you can count on being able to stock up on fresh produce and locally-made products all year round. Spring specialties include locally sourced ramps, a wild-growing, pungent bulb related to onions and leeks, but with a unique flavor all its own.

NORTH ASHEVILLE TAILGATE MARKET

Farmer Markets Independent living NATM

Located on the campus of UNC Asheville, this weekly tailgate market has just about everything you may need to fill your pantry with locally grown and sourced produce. There are plenty of local farmers, bakeries, seafood vendors, and even a composting worm vendor. A few of our favorite North Asheville Tailgate Market vendors include Barnhouse Kitchen offering packaged and frozen pies and strudels, OWL Bakery and Anna’s Pasta & Bakes offering pasta, baked goods, and spices. You can see a full list of the North Asheville Tailgate Market vendors here.

WEST ASHEVILLE TAILGATE MARKET

Welcoming visitors and locals alike on Tuesday afternoons from 3:30 pm-6:30 pm, April-November is the West Asheville Tailgate Market located at 718 Haywood Rd. in West Asheville. The West Asheville Tailgate Market is held rain or shine and you’ll find a rotating list of local vendors across a variety of categories, and they even have live music when the weather is nice. Local offerings include a variety of locally grown vegetables, mushrooms, sourdough and other bakery items, fresh pastas, as well as a coffee truck, ice cream, flowers and plants, and locally produced handicrafts. It’s a great way to spend a Tuesday afternoon.

Staff Spotlight: Pam Pate

Ardenwoods certainly has no shortage of influential, noteworthy and awe-inspiring women in its community — from residents to staff to leadership — and Women’s History Month, celebrated each year in March, is the perfect time to recognize our very own leading ladies.

Pam Pate, Executive Director, Ardenwoods Retirement Community
Pam Pate, Ardenwoods’ Executive Director

“Our leadership team is nine folks, and six of those nine are women,” said Executive Director Pam Pate. “That’s not the case in every business, to see those kinds of numbers.”

In fact, across all departments of Ardenwoods’ community, “we have a really strong group of women,” Pate continued. “Women are really well-suited to work in senior housing, because — generally speaking — women bring compassion and kindness to the job but they’re also able to really get things done. I feel lucky to work with such a great team of women every day.”

Pate herself has been with the community since 2002. As Ardenwoods’ longest-tenured staff member, she was originally hired on as the accounting director, having previously worked in accounting in the manufacturing industry.

“I wanted a job where I could use my accounting skills but have more interaction with people, and senior housing seemed like a great option for that,” she explained. “I actually grew up in Mills River, so I drove by Ardenwoods often, and it seemed like a great fit for me.”

After taking on the role, Pate began getting to know the residents and their families while also taking care of the financial operations of the business — learning all about retirement community structures and different residential models around the country.

“It was great to make those connections that I didn’t really have before,” Pate said. Not only that, but in this line of work “every single day brings a new challenge, a new opportunity — and I like that variety. Even though I’m going on my 21st year here, something will happen today that hasn’t happened any other day in the last 21 years.”

During her time leading accounting, Pate found herself filling in as the interim executive director on a few separate occasions. But in 2017, after 15 years with the company, Pate was asked by her predecessor to officially take on the job.

“It just seemed like an easy transition for our staff and for our residents,” she explained. “Changes in leadership are always a big deal for the residents, and it helps when it’s someone familiar, someone leading the community that they already know.”

After nearly six years as Ardenwoods’ executive director, Pate still enjoys spending time with the community and hearing about the many adventures and life accomplishments of each resident. Outside of Ardenwoods, she enjoys spending time with her husband of 39 years, Bob, who works at Pate’s family farm and garden supply store (Valley Ag in Mills River), their two adult children and 2-year-old granddaughter, and the family dog, Beau.

“I just care so much about the community, and I’m so glad I get to be plugged in and involved on so many different levels,” Pate said.

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